I see you, Mum’s & Dad’s…
Having a Nursery Nurse background, I understand that working parents will feel a little disconnected to their child as Nursery becomes their child’s second home. My first born was put into full time nursery at 4 months old and unfortunately his nursery hours were my working hours (7am-7pm). As a first time parent I missed out on a lot of my sons ‘firsts’, but I had no other choice as I had to make a living. So I understand mum guilt, I understand how important it is to ensure the emotional connections are secure.
I know the quiet guilt so many parents carry - the ache of leaving your little one at a childcare setting when you’re not sure if they’re ready… when you wonder if they’ll feel confused, if they’ll miss you, if you’re somehow creating distance.
You might worry you’re losing connection - that you’re not “there enough” and when sleep is broken and everyone’s running on empty, that guilt can feel even heavier.
But here’s what I want you to know: Attachment isn’t fragile - it’s resilient. It isn’t defined by perfect moments or being together every second. It’s built through love, presence and the simple, powerful truth that you keep showing up.
I totally get it…
I have been on both ends of this relationship… the guilty parent that has no choice but to put her son into Nursery and the role of a child’s Key Person. Even though my son was in the same building as me, I still felt that I wasn’t there for him, when he needed the extra morning cuddles from me but instead I was providing a service for other people’s children and trusting that his key person would give him the warm cuddles that he needed. But then I know that those special bonds between a key person and a child can be so secure from day one. A key person is essentially a child’s ‘Nursery Mum/Dad.’ And the hard fact is that parents need to make a living to provide for their family and give their child(ren) the best start to life.
I have been that parent that looked like I had it all figured out at drop offs, smiling and waving my son goodbye but then reality was, I felt super guilty because he was still so young. I would find myself in the toilet having a little cry because I wasn’t ready to let him go. But then, at the same time I had to ensure I was all put together again to meet and greet other parent’s and children into nursery and give the teary eyed parents the reassurance that they needed to hear so they could walk away with confidence knowing that their most precious little human will be absolutely fine and is cared for in the best possible way.
As someone who’s worked closely with children for over 16 years, being a Nursery Nurse it’s not just a job, it’s taking on each and every child like they’re your own. I have seen the beauty of strong key person bonds - those safe, caring relationships that help children feel secure when they’re away from home.
But please hear this…
You’re not disconnecting. You’re doing your best to give them what they need - care, structure and a world that expands gently. You’re showing up, in all the ways that count, even when it’s hard. That massive smile that you get at pick up is all worth the worry and stress!
And attachment? It’s not broken by nursery drop-offs or tired moments. It’s built over time - through love, presence, hugs, and your deep desire to understand and support them.
I want families to understand that I have been exactly where they are, feeling the guilt and anxiety of having to leave your little one at a childcare setting and feeling second best because your little one seems to love their key person more than you.
But I want to gently remind you of this: No bond will ever replace the one your little one has with you.
That’s why Hush and Hugs is here for you….
Not just to help your little one sleep better, but to help you feel closer, more attuned and more confident in your connection, no matter what situation you’re in.
Over the years, I’ve worked with hundreds of families in nurseries and now through sleep support. I’ve seen every kind of sleep struggle - and every kind of tired parent and I approach each one with compassion, not judgement. I believe in listening first and creating gentle attachment - respecting sleep plans that work for your unique baby, your parenting style and your life.
As parents, we pour so much love into every decision we make - especially when it comes to our little ones sleep. But even with all that love, it’s common to feel uncertain. “Am I doing this right?”, “Why isn’t this working?” These quiet questions can creep in during the most tender moments - the 2am wake-ups, the tears and the days that feel too long.
Second guessing yourself doesn’t mean you’re failing. It means you want the best for your child and you are trying your hardest - even when things feel overwhelming.
At Hush and Hugs, I hold space for all those feelings. I know that sleep challenges aren’t just about schedules or settling techniques - they’re about emotions and the real experience of parenting in the early years. You’re not alone, and you don’t have to figure it all out by yourself!
I will never ask you to ignore your instincts. I will never suggest leaving your baby to cry-it-out. And I will never shame you for how you’re coping right now.
Instead, I’ll walk beside you with calm, supportive strategies that create real change - through connection, not control. Because every family deserves sleep - and even more than that, you deserve to feel confident, supported and truly connected to your child along the way.
A hush of calm in the chaos, and the reassurance of a hug when you need it most.
